Five tips for achieving balance in your world

This article originally appeared on This Woman Can

Mums in business often believe they cannot achieve balance. With ongoing struggles managing conflicting priorities in business, life and self.

Here is the key to achieving balance – find your own meaning. One that suits you and your family. Then implement that into all aspects of your life. Do not adhere to society’s expectations, these are often unachievable. True balance comes when you understand what it means for you.

Here are some tips that have been taken from my latest book that will help you to find balance in your life, within your house, family and relationships:

CREATE PERSONAL GOALS

What do you want to achieve in your life? Just like in business, if you have no direction, nothing to aim for, you will find clarity and focus difficult. If you can’t see the big picture then the day-to-day stresses of life will wear you down.

Your personal goals may be related to your business goals – if you are also a mum, I am sure they will also be much bigger than your business. Your personal goals may direct your business goals. These are your goals so there are no right or wrong answers. Do think big, think about your future, your partner’s future and your children’s future. What do you want from life and business?

Once you have personal goals, put them somewhere you see every day – your fridge, bathroom mirror, back of the toilet door, computer desktop -– wherever you will see them and be reminded of them daily.

SORT OUT YOUR HOUSE

No one enjoys having to clean, cook, shop and wash day in and day out. It is boring, rarely fulfilling and time consuming. All of this is essential – we need to have a clean house and clothes and we need to eat. You don’t have to actually do these tasks, and they certainly don’t need to be as time consuming as you make them.

Plan systems in your house and outsource tasks.

Any task in your house that you repeat over and over again can have a system set-up to accommodate it. Involve your whole family in this system. Better still, consider getting someone else to do it.

Use this time for family time or you time instead.

GET ON THE SAME PAGE AS YOUR PARTNER

Communicate, listen, talk.

Share your goals and dreams. Help each other to achieve them. Give each other support.

When our lives gets busier and busier, it is easy to take our stress out on our partner. Don’t. I have learned when no one else is around he is. Make them the most important person and they will support you through anything.

TAKE FAMILY HOLIDAYS

Going away as a family is a great time to re-connect. In the busyness of life we often get caught up in the day-to-day tasks. A family holiday gives you all space to breath. To have a rest from routines. To recharge, ground and de-stress everyone.

You don’t need to do long overseas holidays – a long weekend camping in the bush an hour from home will achieve the same family connectedness.

It is easy to feel that family holidays are too stressful to organise and plan – we all have been there dragging entire nurseries around. Make it as easy as you can and know that as your children get older, they need less ‘stuff’.

Become a stronger family for time out together.

GIVE YOURSELF GUILT FREE ‘ME TIME’

It is so easy to put yourself last. Neglecting the most important person in this balance equation – you!

How many people rely on you? Employees, contractors, your partner, children to name a few. What happens when you are not able to give to these people? What happens to areas of your life that need you to contribute – like your house – when you are sick?

Could you find time in your busy schedule to do something for you. Can you squeeze 30 minutes a week or 5 minutes a day to do something that brings you peace and rejuvenates you? Daily meditations or walks. Weekly yoga or singing. Time for a book club or photography club. Massage, hair or nails. Anything that allows you to be someone outside of business owner, mum or partner.

Having me time makes you more present at home and in your business. It will give you more energy to keep giving to everyone you need to.

Give one of these tips a try. Implement your favourite into your life and see how things change for you.

The Power of a Campfire

Campfire's bring people together. Encourages intimate conversation. Campfire's are wild and cosy at the same time. Radiating warmth and promising relaxation. Around a campfire anything can happen, they are magical, honest and enchanting. 

When was the last time you experienced a campfire - maybe a firepit, bonfire or even a fire place with a strong mantel and chimney. Been mesmerised by the dancing flames. Warmed by it. Maybe used the heat to cook food or marshmallows. Had conversations that were as deep and mysterious as the flames themselves.

Can you build a fire? Starting with small sticks and eventually allowing bigger and bigger and logs on. Maybe you hunted for the sticks and logs, cleaning up the floor of the forest. Have you watched a fire sizzle down to embers, before eventually nothing - a pile of charcoal left where once flames danced.

Have you smelt the fire smell on your clothes - maybe even your camping equipment or in the house. Reminding you of the connections you made with new and old friends and the conversations - wild and crazy, uninhibited.

Maybe you are left with a different way to view life, a new idea or a fresh way to tackle a problem, maybe you laughed so hard you are just left feeling happy. That is part of the magic of a campfire.

As people, we crave conversation with others. We need it to change our thinking, open our minds and become better versions of ourselves. 

Picture yourself stepping up to my campfire with flames dancing and welcoming you. Joining other people who are likeminded, have businesses and want success and growth. Learning a new way to tackle old problems.

That is the Campfire Conversations series and you are welcome to join my life or business stream - come for all sessions or join us for just one. Learn more here

Connect, gain support and learn. 

Back to school - Business mum style

This article originally appeared on the Business Business Business blog - see it here

The juggle of being a business owner and parent is real. We all feel it and we all have our own way of managing it. Some seem to do it with grace and ease – others simply struggle. And then school holidays happen.

While school holidays have their advantages (no uniforms, lunches, excursions, fundraising, assemblies, 9am start times) they can also hamper your productivity. Especially over the looong break in January (we have 7 weeks) – I am counting down the days until routine can set back in. When I know the hours, I can work in my business on a weekly basis. I can cross things of my to-do list and action my goals.

This year I have started to plan on getting nothing done for my business during the school holidays – or I may set myself one or two ‘projects’ I would like to complete. Anything else is a bonus. This has been hard to achieve, it has mean’t re-thinking my business and the model I operate with. Focusing on core, money making tasks only.

To be able to ‘let go’ during the holidays you need to dedicate some time to planning and preparing your business. Essentially putting it on auto-pilot for a while – especially regarding marketing and promoting it.  You can leave some fulfillment, administration, and business development until after the holidays – simply add tasks to your to-do list. Once I am back in the business, then a couple of admin days later and I am off and running again.

Changing speed in your life, I find, is hard. Switching between parenting and work. Juggling business and school. In school holidays the balance shifts towards your children, opposed to your business. When school starts you need to shift that balance back, and slip back into routines which work for you and your family on a daily basis. Here are my 5 tips to making that easier:

Set your school routines up – uniforms, lunches, communication with the school. Use a new term to freshen up routines which were not effective previously

1. Pre-cook snacks and dinners in the holidays – have them on stand by for those out of control days
2. Don’t set deadlines or events for the school holidays, don’t add pressure to yourself
3. Know your goals for the next term, and the main project you will be working on when you step into your business – start with your feet firmly on the ground
4. Continue your auto-pilot a couple of weeks after you are due back, give her head the time and space to get up to speed again
5. Use holiday time as a time to rest and refresh. It is amazing what might bubble up for you when you are giving yourself the thinking space. Enjoy this time with your children.

There are so many school holidays in a year (12 weeks), plus pupil free days and public holidays, sometimes it feels like you are taking one step forward and two back. And then there is illnesses – bugs and other things collected from schools – sometimes by the time a cold has gone through the house three weeks have disappeared.

I have tried to continue working through the holidays and illness – this resulted in me going around in circles. What has worked for me is forward thinking and planning. Understanding a couple of weeks before holidays will be full on and a couple of weeks after will also be full on – however in between you will get time to be with your children and enjoy their company. This time will not last forever.

Finally, if you do need time to be in your business during school holidays – lets face it seven weeks is a long time. There is always playdates or holiday care to fall back on. Use your support network of mum friends – ease the pressure for both you and your children.

The key to your success

Welcome to a brand new year. What is in store for you for 2018? Are you excited, scared, ready to step outside your comfort zone?

What help do you need to stay on-track, focused and moving forward with clarity.

Do you need a coach? Check out Rachel's programs here

Maybe you need accountability. If you do then maybe an accountability pod is just for you.

In botanical terms pods protect the seeds until ripe and then split open to reveal them. In animal terms a pod is a group of marine animals (think whales and dolphins) or hippopotamuses who group together for protection, support and socialisation. Are you ready to step into a pod that will help you grow into a successful business?

Are you lacking accountability in your business? Would you like a group of people who will support you and believe in you? But you don't have time or money for masterminds, weekly coaching programs and so on.

Let me introduce you to Accountability Pods. You will meet your pod fellows three times formally over a 10 week period. Expanding your goals, maintaining focus and finally - CELEBRATING!

Pods will be run online through Zoom, with dates being set at the first session. You will be placed in a pod with up to 4 other people where we will match business stage, type and challenges as much as we can. There will be a secret Facebook group created for your pod, which you can use between sessions to bounce ideas, gain motivation or just vent. Remembering giving as well as taking.

To join follow this link

The numbers......

It was the week for numbers. Time to weigh in and do body scans – at first I was curious to see how I was going, then I started to feel dread – what if the numbers went the wrong way.

 

Many people are focused purely on what the scales tell them. I had considered buying scales to use at home. I thought that by seeing the numbers on a regular basis it would be my motivation to keep going. I had never been motivated by the numbers on the scale in the past so why would I this time around?

Time to check in on myself. What was my why in re-joining Fernwood and sacrificing sleep in the morning to head off to the gym. It was to gain more energy. It had nothing to do with the numbers, the numbers were secondary and only a goal I set after a few weeks I saw weight loss. So back to the main purpose, was I feeling more energised? YES I WAS.

 

I had created a habit of turning up 3-4 times a week and getting ‘huffy and puffy’. I had also created a new habit of eating right largely thanks to the Challenge. I had support within Fernwood to stay focused on those goals. I was doing more for my own health and wellbeing now than what I was 4 months ago, winning.

What did my numbers show me? They were moving in the right direction – the ones that were supposed to go up were going up, the ones that were supposed to go down were going down. Happy dance. Then I thought – I would like those increases/decreases to be greater. I then asked myself to get that result what did I need to do. The answer, I just needed to keep doing what I was doing but get better at it. More sessions at the gym, less straying into bad food habits.

At the half way mark of the challenge my new ‘bigger’ goals are five times visiting Fernwood and zero tolerance on bad foods (makes me feel sick anyway!). Giving me more energy and more focus to meet the needs of my exciting life!

Be Present

I am more than aware of the importance of being present in your life. I write about it in my book. On Monday this week I was walking home from Fernwood after a workout. The endorphins are running, the air is warm and crisp, the sun is rising over Mt Buninyong, Ballarat is waking up. I tap into all of those positive feelings. Every step I take I enjoy this moment. I don't think about the 100 jobs waiting for me at home that need to be done in the next hour. I am present in my own body and enjoying that walk home.

On Monday and Tuesday I am feeling great - as Lee woud say 'I got this'.

Then on Wednesday I can't get to my early morning workout - instead I steal some cuddles and kisses from my daughter. I get the day started. School drop off and head off to a 9.30 appointment. My head is thinking ahead through everything I need to have done for today, tomorrow night and Friday. My mind is racing, I was actually awake half the night thinking about everything that I needed to do (that coffee at 5pm was a BAD idea).

I stop at the red light, my mind racing, I go - only the car in front is still stopped at the red light. Crash. I close my eyes, open them, I have just hit a car. All because I was too busy thinking about things I shouldn't have been at that time. Luckily all passengers were OK - shaken - and both cars can get repaired.

After organising all the insurance and checking the cars were OK to drive, I retreat home for cuddles with my dog. This was the universe telling me to slow down and be present in my life. However the first thing I did today was not eat - my bad food habit - I didn't eat all day and then reached for sugary lollies to get the energy. So bad.

Tonight I not only feel bad for the accident that I caused and the excess I need to find, but my old food habit taking over - and not getting to the gym.

I am grateful today for my family, who I happily hung out with tonight instead of heading back into Fernwood. I am also grateful for the lessons I have learned today - here is to being more in the present tomorrow and every day after that! A return to the feeling I had on Monday.

Self Care is key to a healthy lifestyle

This week I could have easily fell into that feeling of failure towards the 12 week challenge that I did in the first week. Instead I turned it into self care - and I even had a massage!

This time last week I actually wasn't sure how I would meet all of my commitments for this week, and I hadn't even considered the commitment to get to Fernwood. This week I have travelled 532km's, (not counting playing mum taxi) and spoken five times at four different events. I have networked, celebrated International Women's Day, met some work deadlines, sold some books and my ecourse. Every day I have stuck to the meal plan, had more than enough water, walked twice to school with my daughter and dragged myself to an early morning PT session with Emily-who slowed it down a bit for me (thanks!), although I am still sore today. SO I am not going to think of the three gym sessions that I didn't get to, or any of the challenge meetups I didn't attend.

The first week showed me that I am doing this for long lasting benefits, beyond the 12 weeks, to change my lifestyle to a healthier one, and to look after myself better. Part of looking after myself is to now when I am busy in one area of my life I need to slow down in another - I really truly only have so much time in the day and I still need sleep.

One of the other things I have struggled with is meal prep - things have been pretty busy in my house lately - so I took Monday as a day to plan ahead and get on top of my house needs. To fit the Fernwood meal plan into my meal planning for my family and make it easier for me to prepare food for myself so I eat the right things - all day.

Having a massage was an absolute indulgence this week. I regularly have massages, this week I truly needed it. Helping to loosen up muscles that have been working in the last 6 weeks that haven't worked for a long time. De-stressing in the middle of a crazy week and really what a way to honour International Women's Day!

Next week is not as insane, so I really look forward to resetting and resuming my 6am out of bed and off to Fernwood routine and hopefully to some challenge meetups also!